I see the light now, but for a long time, I felt like life had handed me a character to play, and it wasn’t a good one. It was terrible! I walked around with this heavy mindset, seeing myself as the “victim” in my own life story. And you know what? I had every reason to feel that way. There were some serious struggles, setbacks, and scars in my past that gave me plenty of ammunition to reinforce that view. If life was a stage, it felt like I was playing a tragic role, a character like Sofia from The Color Purple—that was the role Oprah Winfrey played in a movie with the same name, someone who’s constantly carrying the burdens of bad memories and pain.
One day, something very exciting came to me. I mean, it really hit me hard, like a ton of bricks out of nowhere. I realized I didn’t have to keep playing that character of Sofia anymore. I didn’t have to see myself as limited, oppressed, or held back by circumstances. And, crucially, I didn’t have to let past experiences define me forever. I had a choice. It was like suddenly waking up and seeing that, all along, I’d been looking at life through a very narrow tube. I’d been limiting my own view. So, I threw that tube away and opened my other eye. And what I saw surprised me. I saw more than just the color purple.
The world was much wider, more open than I’d allowed myself to believe. That shift in perspective made me think, If I could be anyone, who would I want to be? I asked myself, If I had a magic wand, and nothing was impossible, what would I ask for? What kind of life would I want to live, realistically for me?
It didn’t take long for the answers to come. They came quickly and clearly, almost like I’d been waiting all my life to ask this question. There were three things I’d always wanted. The first was to be an A-lister in Hollywood, to walk onto a movie set and be one of the greats. The second was to fill stadiums as a singer, to stand on a stage in front of thousands, living that rock star dream. And the third was to be an author, to share my voice, my thoughts, and my story through writing.
But reality has a way of trimming the options down. For starters, being an actor was out. I’ve tried, and it turns out my memory isn’t built for it. I can’t remember lines. It’s just not something I can do, even though I’ve got the natural acting chops for it. And singing? Well, I can’t hold a tune, and remembering lyrics is just as hard as remembering lines. I’m sixty, and I still don’t know the full lyrics to a single song, not even the national anthem!
But writing? Now, writing was different. I could do that. I had things to say, a lot of them. And when I saw what Amazon was doing—how it’s now possible for anyone to publish a book—I thought, Well, why not? The doors had opened in a way that wasn’t possible before. No one could stop me from putting my thoughts out there, so I did. I took the leap. I started writing.
Here’s the thing, though: I still don’t fit into the world around me, not really. I still feel out of place, like I’m living in a world where everyone else is seeing life through one lens while I’m seeing it through another. And you know what? I’m okay with that now. I am no longer playing a character in The Color Purple.
I accept that I’m different, and I see that difference as something incredible, a strength rather than a flaw. Because when I talk to people, or just observe them, I realize something—most people don’t carry around the kind of knowledge I do. They’re not as curious. They’re not as introspective. I used to think everyone thought deeply about life, just like I do, but as it turns out, they don’t. Not everyone is wired to dig deep or question things in the way I am.
It’s isolating, sure. But now, instead of feeling like that isolation is a burden, I see it as part of my gift. I have this inner library of experiences, insights, and lessons that I’ve gathered through a lifetime of observing, reflecting, and living through things that aren’t easy. And because I see things differently, I’ve decided to share that with the world. That’s why I write. I write because I want to put my thoughts out there. Maybe someone will read them, maybe not. But it feels good to know they’re out there, floating around, ready for whoever might need them. And let’s be honest—the bragging rights for being an author aren’t bad, either.
Now, looking back, I realize how easy it is to get trapped in that “victim” mindset, to think you’re limited to a role you didn’t even choose. But life isn’t like that. Life gives you room to pick your character. You don’t have to be Sofia from The Color Purple. If you’re going to choose, why not choose someone who inspires you? Why not aim to be someone strong, curious, or adventurous, someone like Amelia Earhart? She didn’t see limitations; she saw horizons.
So here’s my message to anyone feeling stuck or weighed down by the roles life seems to have handed them: You don’t have to accept that role. If you’re seeing life through a narrow lens, maybe it’s time to throw that tube away and open your other eye. Ask yourself, If I could be anyone, who would I want to be? What kind of life would I choose if I could?
You don’t have to be a passive character in someone else’s story. You get to write your own. And if that means standing out, if that means being “different” or going against the grain, then embrace it. I used to think I was just one of the many people out there trying to find my way. But I’ve come to see that some of us are different because we’re meant to share a different perspective. We’re meant to challenge, to question, to think deeply about things that others might brush off. It can be lonely, but it’s also powerful.
In the end, writing isn’t just something I do for myself—it’s a way to reach out to those few who are like me. Those who see the world differently, who don’t fit into the mainstream mold. Perhaps those still stuck in The Color Purple. I put my thoughts out there for the ones who might read them and feel understood, who might see their own reflections in my words. That, to me, is worth every moment spent wrestling with words, every isolated thought, every “different” view. And if nothing else, I get to live my life knowing I’ve created something, shared a piece of myself, and walked a path that’s uniquely mine.
So, here I am, a sixty-year-old who can’t remember song lyrics but can pour his heart into a page. I might not be standing on a Hollywood set or singing to a stadium full of fans, but I’m doing something real. I’m doing what I was meant to do. And for anyone who’s reading this and feeling like they don’t belong—maybe you don’t belong because you’re here to create, to question, and to show the world a different way of seeing things.
If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s this: don’t settle for a role that doesn’t fit. Don’t accept the narrow view. Open your other eye, and let yourself imagine what’s possible. You’ve got more choice, more power to redefine yourself than you probably realize. And if you’re going to pick a role, choose one that lets you stretch, one that lets you live fully, one that allows you to be exactly who you’re meant to be. Escape The Color Purple, you’re not Sofia.
About the author:
Tony Jarrah is an Author from Melbourne, Australia.
By clicking on the images to the sides of this you will be taken to their Amazon listings, where you can acquire Tony’s books for yourself or as a gift.
You can heal your life. You have nothing to lose, and remember,
Thoughts Have Power.
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